Strong with Cracks

I'll admit it, I don't always understand myself. I'm a very take care of myself person who is at the same time kinda needy. I'm the one that wants to stand out but wishes she could fit in. I'm the one that been hurt and is over it, but never can forget enough to not be afraid anymore. I'm a quiet person that actually just wants to talk and hang out. I'm a loud person who just wants to not have to be. Sometimes I feel like I'm falling apart. Sometimes I'm fighting the world with one hand behind my back and having fun with it. I'm a hard person to get to know, because most people think they know me after they figure out the first layer and never realize there is anything else to see, much less that there's walls to break down. Sad part is I think the more I try not to be like that the worse it gets. I really love my family and the friends that are just as much a part of it. I have my skills. I've taken many falls, but stood up every time. And I pray to God that everything ends up right.